RISE Part 1 – Week 1: How To Keep Your First Love (Female edition)

Pastor Jane Evans   -   March 1, 2022

Can you remember the feeling of falling in love for the very first time? It is an all consuming feeling that overtakes your mind, will and emotions. You can’t stop thinking about that person, you want to spend every waking minute with them, and when you are with them, time stands still and the rest of the world fades.

Immediately following salvation, the Spirit of God enters our life and confirms that a new relationship has been established with God.

“For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God’s children.” (Romans 8:16)

God’s Spirit within us produces love for and obedience to God and His Word. As long as we are dependent upon God for our strength and are obedient to His Word, we experience the grace of a new Christian’s “first love.” (Talk about the first time you fell in love with Jesus. What was it like?)

CAN WE LEAVE OUR “FIRST LOVE”?

The Bible warns about the fact that we can lose this “first love” and allow it to dwindle into something that is born out of duty, tradition, familiarity or even guilt. 

(Revelation 2:2-5)

“I know your deeds and your labor and perseverance, and that you cannot tolerate evil people, and you have put those who call themselves apostles to the test, and they are not, and you found them to be false; and you have perseverance and have endured on account of My name, and have not become weary. But I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Therefore, remember from where you have fallen, and repent, and do the deeds you did at first; or else I am coming to you and I will remove your lampstand from its place—unless you repent.” 

HOW DO WE LEAVE OUR “FIRST LOVE?”

  • Is it because of not working for God?
    • No. We can be very busy for God and still not have the joy of our “first love.” The church which left its first love had both “works” and “labor.” They even labored for the right Person and the right cause. 
  • Is it because of not reading the Bible?
    • No. We can have all the knowledge of the Bible and still lose our “first love.” The Pharisees knew the scriptures well. The church, which left its first love, also knew the Word. They used the Word to check the authenticity of apostles.
  • Is it because of not praying?
    • No. We can pray and still be spiritually cold.
  • Is it because of not witnessing?
    • No. It is possible to witness and still have a dullness in our souls. The work of the church which left its first love certainly included witnessing. 

WE LEAVE OUR “FIRST LOVE” WHEN WE LOSE OUR DAILY AWARENESS OF OUR NEED FOR GOD.

Our need for God is the very motivation that brings us to salvation; however, once God begins to meet our needs, we tend to take our relationship with him for granted and forget we even have needs. We become like the church in Revelation that was “rich and increased with goods” and feel that we don’t have need for anything. Then we lose our “first love.” (See Revelation 3:17.)

We see a process in God’s dealing with His own people. God led Israel out of the bondage of Egypt to the Promised Land. Each step of the way brought new needs which were far beyond their ability to meet: deliverance from the pursuing Egyptian army, food and water in the barren desert, and direction on where and when to move. All through those years God did not allow the Israelites to plant crops or to build houses; they were totally dependent on His provision, direction and protection. Even the absence of manna one day each week was a powerful reminder not to take Him for granted.

When the Israelites reached the edge of the Promised Land, God predicted that they would lose their love for Him, and He told them exactly how it would happen. The very same sequence takes place in our lives today!

“FIRST LOVE” IS KEPT BY REALIZING OUR DAILY NEED FOR GOD.

BY NOT ALLOWING THINGS BECOME IDOLS

When God provides for our needs, we tend to take His provision for granted, or worse, become vain and think that it was our own strength or wisdom that met our needs. We become ungrateful and fail to maintain our dependence upon God. Instead, we depend upon our own abilities, wisdom, strength and resources.

For example, if we expect money to do for us what only God can do, then money has become our god. We begin to build our lives around our source of security.

When problems which are beyond our resources to solve, come and threaten our security, we experience fear. Fear of loss is God’s signal that something or someone else is a priority instead of God. That thing has become god in place of God.  

BY PRACTICING GRATITUDE DAILY

(Talk about an experience where a child/friend has lost gratitude for what you have done for them and how that makes you feel…)

As soon as God allowed His people to enjoy the abundant provisions of the Promised Land, they forgot the idea of a day-by-day provision for their needs. They no longer counted on the hand of God for bread, but trusted in their own hands and the land to raise crops. They no longer needed God to keep their shoes from wearing out, like they did in the wilderness. They multiplied their gold and silver so they could make and buy all the shoes they wanted.

Before long the very warning that God gave them beforehand came true. 

(Deuteronomy 8:11-14)

“Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God, failing to observe his commands, his laws and his decrees that I am giving you this day. Otherwise, when you eat and are satisfied, when you build fine houses and settle down, and when your herds and flocks grow large and your silver and gold increase and all you have is multiplied, then your heart will become proud and you will forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.” 

Often we are very aware of physical needs, but we must also become more and more aware of our spiritual, mental and emotional needs. The more we are aware of all these needs, the more intense is our prayer. The more we are aware of the needs of others, the more intense is our intercession. The more we are aware of God meeting these needs, the more genuine is our thanksgiving. The more we tell others of His faithfulness and generosity in meeting our needs, the more sincere our praise is.

When we are secure about the future and well-fed for the present, we begin to believe that we can avoid the consequences of violating God’s standards. We lose our fear of the Lord. We become bold in doing those things which displease Him. We do not fear Him not meeting our needs, because we think that they are already met.

WHAT THINGS ARE IMPORTANT TO ME?

(List in order of importance.)

Have I committed each one to the Lord? By doing so, I will be able to thank God and trust Him concerning whether or not He allows me to continue having it.

ELEVEN SYMPTOMS THAT I HAVE LEFT MY “FIRST LOVE” FOR THE LORD:

“But I have this against you, that you have left your first love.” (Revelation 2:4)

  1. When my delight in the Lord is no longer greater than my delight in someone else, I have left my “first love.”

“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart…” (Mark 12:30)

  1. When my soul does not long for times of rich fellowship in God’s Word or in prayer, I have left my “first love.”

“And you must love the Lord your God with all your… soul…” (Mark 12:30)

  1. When my thoughts during leisure moments don’t EVER reflect upon the Lord, I have left my “first love.”

“And you must love the Lord your God with…all your mind…” (Mark 12:30) 

“…in all his (the wicked man) thoughts there is no room for God.” (Psalm 10:4)

  1. When I claim to be “only human”, and I easily give in to those things which I know displease the Lord, I have left my “first love.”

“And you must love the Lord your God with all your…strength.” (Mark 12:30)

 “If you keep my commands, you will remain in my love…” (John 15:10)

 “If you love me, keep my commands.” (John 14:15).

  1. When I do not willingly and cheerfully give to God’s work or to the needs of others, I have left my “first love.”

“If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion–how can God’s love be in that person?” (1 John 3:17)

  1. When I cease to treat every Christian as I would the Lord, I have left my “first love.”

“…whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40)

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (John 13:34)

  1. When I view the commands of Christ as restrictions to my happiness rather than expressions of His love, I have left my “first love.”

“Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them. And I will love them and reveal myself to each of them.” (John 14:21).

  1. When I inwardly strive for the acclaim of this world rather than the approval of the Lord, I have left my “first love.”

“Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you.” (1 John 2:15) 

“The world would love you as one of its own if you belonged to it, but you are no longer part of the world.” (John 15:19)

  1. When I fail to make Christ of His words known I have left my first love. 
  2. When I become complacent to sinful conditions around me, I have left my “first love.”

“Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold.” (Matthew 24:12).

  1. When I am unable to forgive another for offending me, I have left my “first love.”

“If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer, that person is a liar…” (1 John 4:20)

PERSONAL EVALUATION:

Which of these 11 symptoms apply to me?

Do I delight in someone else more than in the Lord?

Do I no longer long for times of fellowship in God’s Word and in prayer?

Do I no longer reflect at all upon the Lord during leisure moments?

Do I easily give in to those things which I know displease the Lord?

Do I give grudgingly to God’s work or turn a blind eye to the needs of other people?

Do I fail to treat every Christian as I would treat the Lord?

Do I view the commands of Christ as restrictions to my happiness rather than expressions of His love?

Do I inwardly strive for public acclaim more than the approval of the Lord?

Do I fail to witness to others because my fear is greater than my love for God.  

Do I overlook or ignore the sinful habits in my life?

Do I hold grudges against those who have offended me?

Becoming a Christian is not a calendar event, it’s a relationship that must be fed and watered every day in order to grow and flourish. We need to see ourselves as sinners in need of forgiveness, no matter how long you have known Christ. This helps us work on our own relationship with Jesus rather than judge what we think is a lack of evidence of it, in other people’s lives.

DOING “THE FIRST WORKS” WITH DEEPER UNDERSTANDING

The disciplines of prayer, bible study, giving, fasting and Christian service lead to new love for the Lord and are actually designed to maintain in us a sense of our need for Him.

We tend to think that the more faithful we are to God, the more “spiritual” we will feel, but quite the reverse should take place. The more Paul grew in spiritual maturity, the more he realized how unworthy and needy he was. Paul described himself as “…the least of the apostles, that are not meant to be called an apostle…” (1 Corinthians 15:9). That is the kind of spiritual progress that will keep our “first love” alive.

If our goal in each of these disciplines is to understand more deeply our total need of and dependence on God, then we will discover the “poverty of spirit” to which the Kingdom of Heaven belongs. “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 5:3)

  1. A DEEPER LOOK AT PRAYER

Each aspect of prayer is designed to maintain our “first love” by reminding us of our sense of need before God.

Petitions reveal our motives. Do they seek to advance God’s Kingdom, or are they attempts to build up our reserves so we will not have to call on Him so much in the future?

Confession cleanses us of our misalignment with God. It reminds us of Jesus’ imputed righteousness, and removes any hindrance from walking in victory through His power.

Thanksgiving measures our sense of need as we thank God for meeting specific needs during each day.

Intercession is the means by which we share the needs of others before God’s throne.

  1. A DEEPER LOOK AT STUDYING THE BIBLE

Reading scripture certainly causes us to grow, as the apostle Paul put it, “in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” The initial function of getting into God’s Word, however, is not only to grow, but also to see our need to grow. As “newborn babies” we are to “…crave pure spiritual milk…” (1 Peter 2:2). Our sense of need turns into our desire for the Word.

Studying the Bible may sometimes lead to discouragement as we learn more about God’s holy standards and realize how far short we fall in reaching them. Yet, this very sense of discouragement can be transformed into a deeper sense of need before a loving, merciful God. “For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust.” (Psalm 103:14).

  1. A DEEPER LOOK AT GIVING

The command to “freely give” when we have “freely received” is a practical necessity if we are to maintain our sense of dependence upon the Lord. The tithe is not just “a giving of the tenth,” but it is a weekly reminder that all belongs to God.

The more we build assets for our future, the more prone we are to feel that we do not need God in ways that other people do. “You say, ‘I am rich. I have everything I want. I don’t need a thing!’ And you don’t realize that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked.” (Revelation 3:17). That which we do not give away represents responsibility, not ownership.

  1. A DEEPER LOOK AT FASTING

Fasting is one of the most effective reminders of our need to depend upon God for “our daily bread.” It is also a vital reminder of the warning which God gave to his own people. “Beware that in your plenty you do not forget the Lord your God…for when you have become full and prosperous…do not become proud at that time and forget the Lord your God…” (Deuteronomy 8:11-12, 14).

Fasting illustrates the reality that life does not consist of things which we possess, and that we do not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God. (See Luke 12:15 and Deuteronomy 8:3). Fasting dims the things of this world and opens up a deeper awareness of the spiritual, mental and emotional needs which we have.

  1. A DEEPER LOOK AT SERVING

One of the greatest benefits of Christian service is not to those who are served, but to those who are serving. The Bible says that every one of us were given not just the gift of salvation and forgiveness but other gifts as well! Those gifts are not meant for our own use but they are gifts that we are meant to serve others with. The cool thing is that God has wired those gifts with joy so that when we serve others using them, the result in both us and them is JOY! (See Ephesians 4:7-8 NLT)

The statements “I’m not capable of teaching that class” or “I can’t witness” totally miss the point of Spirit-led Christian service. It is not that we are sufficient within ourselves but that we are totally inadequate to do anything apart from God’s power working through us.

Paul explained, “I came to you in weakness with great fear and trembling…so that your faith might not rest on human wisdom, but on God’s power.” (1 Corinthians 2:3, 5).

Action Step this week:

Throughout your appointments this week, take one minute before each to pause and pray, “God, I need your help in this appointment.” Let this simple prayer rekindle that fresh, heartfelt connection to God, turning your routine meetings into moments where you invite Him into your life.